Monday, March 14, 2011

What I'm reading...when I can concentrate

Yes, I know I have not posted in months. This winter has been a tough one for me, between trying to keep up with my small efforts at volunteer work, a couple of bouts with the flu, and the whiplash I sustained after a car accident at the end of January. Recently, while exercising in the pool, it appears I have strained or sprained my right ankle. The beat goes on...and on...and on.

I've been reading a book with a rather provocative title, "How to be sick." by Toni Bernhardt. She was diagnosed with CFS/ME after an episode with the flu, much like I was. Her premise is that there are Buddhist principles which can help those who deal, on a daily basis, with chronic, debilitating illness.

Here's a link to her story, in brief. Toni is worse off than I am, being pretty much bedfast most days, and housebound almost constantly. She talks about the things she has missed and has had to learn to manage in other ways. The chief thing that impressed me was her use of technology to reach out to her children and family.

Can I say, if I were in her position, I don't know how I would cope with that disconnect from my children and grandchildren. I suppose you do what you have to do. Just yesterday, I got to hold my new grandson. How do you replace that with technology? How do I replace the hugs and kisses of my grandchildren, their smiling faces when I see them? How do I replace seeing my children and the lives they have made for themselves, up close.

So, I just keep on trying to do these things, although I often am faced with pain for a week or more after I make the effort. I love them so much, I would miss the touching and holding, the seeing and the listening in person.